We all know that Terrell Owens loves himself some TO. We also know now that TO likes himself some champagne, strawberries, hot tubs, and real estate agents.
TO’s new reality show on VH1, “The TO Show,” confirms everything we already knew about the Buffalo Bills wide receiver. He’s selfish, likes to be the center of attention, and doesn’t really listen to anyone else. The pilot episode last night centered around TO’s two publicists (who I refer to as his “handlers”), Kita and Monique trying to change TO’s image from TO to Terrell. I don’t think giving the entire world a look into the life of one the biggest divas in NFL history was the best move.
Apparently, the show is supposed to show a different side of TO. What it does is show the viewers that TO is exactly the same at home as he is out in public. He pays up $137,000 for diamond earrings. He invites an entire club back to his house for a party. He hooks up with his real estate agent in his hot tub. On the field, he always wants the ball. Off the field, he always the attention.
The show also seems painfully calculated. He is forced by his handlers to contact his ex-fiance to see how she is doing. When TO meets with her, he dodges her questions about his love life, a la Drew Rosenhaus. He had to have learned it somewhere. TO didn’t want to go meet with her. He is forced into it by his handlers and he makes it clear he doesn’t want to do what they tell him. It’s hard to imagine that Jeff Garcia, Donovan McNabb, and Tony Romo know how Kita and Mo feel.
The show did have one interesting part which, surprisingly, pertained to football. In one scene, TO sits down with his best friend Pablo, a large dude that cuts rank farts on the LA freeways, and divulges how his meeting with Jerry Jones went when Jones told TO that he was no longer a member of the Dallas Cowboys. The reasoning that TO says Jones used makes perfect sense: I support you 100%, so I’m going to cut you. Jones’ method of drawing a diagram on a tablecloth is original to say the least. The show becomes even more amusing when TO describes waiting around so he could take the tablecloth with him after the meeting.
The advent of “The T.O. Show” has to be a low point in the history of reality TV shows. If TO’s handlers want to “change the man,” as is their mantra throughout the show, then they should take my advice: get him out of the spotlight. The less there is of TO, the more people like him. The last thing that will change people’s opinions about him is seeing him in his cushy personal life still being TO. As a closet Philadelphia Eagles fan, the disdain factor for TO just reaches the ridiculous. If TO wasn’t already a joke to people before, he has definitely surpassed that now. If he was already a joke to people, he has pushed himself totally out of the radar.
Dick Jauron and Trent Edwards, study up. Using this show as film on how to deal with TO could come in more handy than any other games tapes you have on him.
You can watch the episode here.